At Huff-Po, Sean Penn explains the "nature of Americanism and language" to the confused and "simple-minded media."

As far as I can tell, Penn's understanding of "Americanism" requires...

1. The locking up of former American President George W. Bush for crimes against humanity and...

2. Smiling and embracing the "warm and friendly" current president of Venezuela.

Penn calls those who criticized Barack Obama's friendly treatment of Hugo Chavez America-hating "smirking spitters" and "among the greatest cowards in American history."

Penn claims to know Chavez (a committed Marxist) "well" and says he is a man "with a robust sense of humor."

"With a friend, or an enemy," Penn counsels, "our president will gain greater strategic position with a smile."

Makes you wonder how Sean Penn has avoided appointment to the U.S. State Department all these years.

Meanwhile, in "related" Huff-Po news, Chavez calls Obama "a poor ignoramus."

That Chavez, what a card!

At least we can all look forward to Sean Penn's next post on the misunderstood - but hilariously funny - Kim Jong Il, and why George W. Bush should be hanged for the mass starvation of the North Korean people.