Tuesday, August 4, 2009

A Supersized Confession

Anti-fast food zealots and human rights lawyers might have something to say about the torturous acts inflicted on accused murderer Jermaine Burgess to get him to confess to his crimes.

Upper Darby detectives plied him with McDonald's fat-laden and colesterol-stuffed food inducing him to spill his guts about two murders.

Known as "Supersizing the Suspect" in police parlance, the skell is force to return to his cell craving McDonald's burgers and fries if he doesn't talk. Police also offer cigarettes to addicted smokers to elicit information and confessions.

Such treatment is not yet banned by any international treaty on the treatment of prisoners but it is only a matter of time.

5 Comments:

Anonymous jake said...

Oh no, first waterboarding and now Whopper-gorging. What's next -- beer diplomacy?
No wait, that has to be reserved for teachable moments of racial profiling and cop bashing.

August 4, 2009 at 9:57 AM 
Blogger steve mcdonald said...

this is clearly george w bush's fault.

actually, i didn't realize they've used mcdonalds before, clever. too bad the aclu will start kicking on against this if they haven't already...

August 4, 2009 at 2:19 PM 
Anonymous dingo said...

I hear that for a Biggie Size Double Cheesburger meal you can get Gil to admit he was the son of sam

August 4, 2009 at 9:13 PM 
Blogger Pro Christ Pro Gun said...

The dreaded french fries up your nose pickles between your toes method of interrogation. . .

Dick Durbin - help!

C. Scott Shields

August 5, 2009 at 4:27 AM 
Blogger steve mcdonald said...

I'd admit to anything if they took away re-runs of "Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia"

August 7, 2009 at 12:14 PM 

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