Friday, August 24, 2007

Another GOP Dirty Trick

Just when local Democrats were showing signs of having a chance in the upcoming county council races, the GOP machine roared into action to stop the insurgents in their tracks.
The Republican brain trust put their heads together and came up with the most devilish plot ever to woo voters and leave Democratic candidates sputtering about the unfairness of it all: A dog park.
Even though we all know Republicans secretly hate dogs (cats too), they have fiendishly reached out to a large constituency to make it look like they care about them and their owners.
Coming off severe criticism that he accused Democratic council candidate David Landau of being an ACLU-type attorney, GOP leader and County Council president Andy Reilly recently wondered out loud if Landau didn't once work in a lab where shaved bunnies were used to test the toxicity of eye-liner and other cosmetics.
Stepping into the GOP trap, county Democrats rushed to condemn the dog park as a terrible idea and waste of money.
"We don't have a county health department," said Dem county chairman Cliff Wilson, "and these guys blow 300 grand on a dog park?"
Republicans were quick to respond.
"Just because Cliff Wilson hates dogs and never picks up after his own, doesn't mean a dog park is a bad idea," said retired Springfield GOP chairman Charles P. Sexton. Sexton has pretended to love dogs for 60 years.
"In truth, I prefer ferrets. I have 30 of them in my basement. But that's off the record and if you report it, I'll deny it."